Ode To Central Park

To the new tenants of Central Park apartment 118 (effective April 15, 2014) :

I know you're probably so excited to move into this place....I know we were......oh don't worry if you hear loud water running late at night.  I mean, it could be somebody taking a shower, but it's probably the ceiling leaking just outside your room....so just make sure to bring some extra towels. You won't regret it ;)

It will be normal for you to hear a woman screaming at 4 a.m.  It will be really scary and you won't be able to sleep and your neighbors will think you're crazy.  Hum your favorite hymn and you'll be fine.  

You'll be arriving in the Spring time which is great because this place has TOP-NOTCH air conditioning. And trust me, you.will.need.it. It's so quiet and subtle you won't even know it's there!  The maintenance crew will seem to be annoyed if you ever need to file a maintenance report...but don't worry, they will come if you have any AC problems.  When they get there to fix it, they will realize that oh wait! You never even had AC in the first place!! So, it won't take as long as planned to fix it. Perfect, right? 

After about 5 months or so, the florescent bathroom light will start to flicker. Just hit it a couple times and it will be good as new.  But when it does go out, you know that the maintenance crew will be SO happy to come and fix it. ;)

You will be conveniently located directly across from the indoor pool, which provides a nice view of your neighbors' pool parties (and the old lady next door doing water aerobics). The water from the pool will inevitably be splashed right onto your sliding glass door.  

Oh, speaking of sliding glass doors, you only get one.  This one door is supposed to make up for the lack of natural light.  That's right, you won't need to worry about all that annoying light coming through in the morning, because there are no windows!  How convenient for you!  Your eyes will be so adjusted to the dark that it will be hard for you to even go outside.  Just don't count on the sunlight waking you up so set your alarm..... this cannot be stressed enough....

If it ever rains, you won't have to stay inside to watch it through the window.... one because you don't have a window, and two, it will come inside anyway! That's right! For a very up-close-and-personal view of the wonderful rainstorms, just take a step outside and you will feel it coming down through the ceiling.  But the ceiling did get replaced.....just don't be surprised if they ever decide to replace it again WHILE it's raining.

  

Here at Central Park, they are all about sharing.  They are great about sharing what they have with others. I'm talking about community kitchens where everyone shares everything (oh, because you won't have an oven in your apartment).  Quaint, right? So you will learn how to be competitive too,  especially on Sunday's when every girl is trying to cook a nice dinner for their husband.  Hopefully you have early church so you can snag that oven before someone else does!!  You will also get a workout going back and forth between your room and the ovens.

We are convinced that you will make many new memories here.  Ones that you will never forget!  But if you're lucky like we were, you will also realize that you had the time of your life :)  And you might even miss it when it's about time for you to leave :)  Have fun, and make the most....